With My Whole Heart

When you need to remember — that You're still my Shepherd.

You can show up to worship lately as a fraction — half your heart in the room, the other half running budget math, replaying a conversation, scanning for the next problem. You are not faithless. You are spread thin. The praise comes out small because the heart it is coming from has been splintered into too many tabs. You do not need to feel more. He answered you on the day you cried — the strength He put in your soul is still there — and the whole heart can come back, even if you have to gather it piece by piece on the way to praise.

He opens with the move: "I will praise You with my whole heart; before the gods will I sing praise unto You." Whole heart, in front of every rival claim. Then the reason: "I will worship toward Your holy temple and praise Your name for Your lovingkindness and Your truth; for You have magnified Your word above all Your name." His word is set above even His name — what He has spoken cannot be undone. Then the receipt: "In the day when I cried, You answered me and strengthened me with strength in my soul." There is a day. He was crying. God answered. Strength came. Then the widening: "Though the Lord is high, yet He has respect unto the lowly; but the proud He knows from afar." The proud He keeps at distance; the lowly He looks toward. The close brings it back to where life happens: "Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me; You will stretch forth Your hand against the wrath of my enemies, and Your right hand shall save me. The Lord will perfect that which concerns me." Not "remove me from the trouble" — revive in the middle of it. "Your mercy, O Lord, endures forever; forsake not the works of Your own hands." He will not abandon what He has made.

• Right now, gather the heart — pray out loud, slowly: "I will praise You with my whole heart" — and name the day He answered you. • Write this down: "What 'day I cried and He answered' do I need to put back at the front of my memory today?" • Repeat this line when trouble crowds the room: "Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me."

Stop. Breathe. Let the day He answered you stand back up in your memory until the heart starts to come back together, then tell Him exactly which trouble you need to be revived in the middle of — out loud if you can.

God, I will praise You with my whole heart — even if I have to gather it piece by piece off the floor to do it. You answered me in the day when I cried, and You strengthened me with strength in my soul, and I am not going to act like that did not happen. You are high, and You are still bowed low toward me — the lowly is who You look toward, and I am one of the lowly today. Though I walk in the midst of trouble, revive me; stretch forth Your hand; let Your right hand save me. Perfect that which concerns me, because Your mercy endures forever and You do not forsake the works of Your own hands. You're still my Shepherd.

He revives you in the middle of the trouble, not after it.